Compiling a top 10 list of the best cabaret songs is demonstrably impossible. For starters, if everyone only used those songs they would promptly become corny and clichéd, and no longer be ‘the best’ anyway. Moreover, a great song that is suitable and successful for one artist and their particular show is not going to be the right choice for another performer - and vice versa.
However, we can continue to look at the cabaret music you would do best to avoid, and after the response to Top 10 Songs Not To Use In Cabaret, here are some more cabaret repertoire choices that you shouldn’t be making…
And I’m Telling You (Dream Girls)
Like Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” or Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On”, any cover of this song exposes several important facts. For starters, without the vocalizing and Jennifer Hudson’s mammoth voice ripping into it, the melody and sentiments of this song are actually dull and generic. Moreover it goes on and on, until your audience can’t help beginning to wish you would actually stop telling them. Finally, short of being a singer like Houston, Dion or Hudson, this song will show up every vocal problem as you try to emulate their sound or style. I’m telling you – give it a miss.
Taylor the Latte Boy (Kristen Chenoweth)
This little stand-alone comedy number represents a cabaret type here – that contemporary and cutesy charm song that everyone falls in love with once they hear it, and immediately makes plans to work it into their show, or sing it at their next audition. These kinds of songs go in waves: one minute everyone is using them - the next everyone is so over them they never want to hear those witty lyrics and catchy tune ever again. Good thing is, in five years time, a revival of said number will be retro-fresh and funny again. Leave it till then.
Gimme, Gimme (Thoroughly Modern Millie)
“Flavour of the month” songs aren’t just from a particular signature performance suddenly inflaming everyone’s creative juices. Styles and song sentiments go in popularity cycles too, where repetitive lyrics become catchy, universal feelings are expressed, and a rather thin and empty song just happens to be the right sing at the right time. This recent example boils down to being about wanting someone to love – obviously there are no other songs out there on this particular topic, so clearly all cabaret artists currently feel the need to sing this one.
Don’t Cry Out Loud (Peter Allen)
Big, belting, heart-wrenching showstoppers are always a risky choice for cabaret. Unlike in a blockbuster musical or stadium concert, a small hour cabaret show gives little time or space to plausibly reach a song of this vocal size or emotional intensity, and an intimate audience are likely to feel uncomfortable if you pour your passions out over them so blatantly. The lyrics of song are also oxymoronic in that you’re not keeping it inside or hiding your feelings; so without the illusion of theatre’s fourth wall, in cabaret this comes across at best as ironic and at worst as hypocritical!
Tomorrow (Annie)
What are you, twelve? No. Just no.
Every Breath You Take (The Police)
For some strange reason, this classic stalker song gets dragged out regularly in the cabaret scene. It unwittingly functions as a kind of lame self-defense against the intimacy of cabaret: a defiant reminder to the audience that you’re looking back at them while you perform. But it’s creepy, and it’s clichéd, and it’s far too common a choice.
Everything’s Coming Up Roses (Gypsy)
There are plenty of songs to illustrate this point, but this popular choice is a prime example. Unlike in a musical, a cabaret audience is less prepared to put up with any song that spells out emotion or situations in an obvious way, or simply functions to reiterate dialogue that preceded or follows it. In other very ‘theatrey’ songs tend to abound in common motifs and larger-than-life ideas that fit nicely on a big stage or in a big show, but come across as embarrassingly over-blown and over-done in cabaret.
Piano Man (Billy Joel)
This song is the bane of any pianist’s professional life, and there is very little that will save it from being a dreary, self-indulgent, unconscious parody of the man himself. Launching into it late in the evening after plying your audience with copious amounts of alcohol to get them suitably sentimental may be the only way, but there’s no guarantee; and if you have to resort to this tactic, you need to realize they probably won’t even remember you were there performing at all…
Music of the Night (Phantom of the Opera)
Having made the transition from a television slapstick village idiot to romantic music theatre icon, Michael Crawford has a lot to answer for. Contrary to popular belief, this signature song is not an illustration of the fact that you don’t have to a great singer to sing impressive-sounding music – because it turned out Crawford could, in fact, sing. Nonetheless, this song tends to be a wannabe cabaret choice by those who wish they could sing it, rather than those who can.
Hey Big Spender (Sweet Charity)
For a lot of inexperienced cabaret performers, the opportunity to stage something really sultry or raunchy like this song is a new and exciting experience. However, what is an unusual and thrilling change for you as an artist does not immediate translate into the same for the audience, and bad burlesque that depends solely on performing something like this has become a regular occurrence. The desire to challenge yourself in cabaret is great, but make sure you also challenge your audience with your music choices as well as your sexy moves…
The best advice to give in choosing songs for cabaret is to get out and see as many other shows as possible to ensure your new party piece isn’t everyone else’s discarded cliché, and get feedback early on from people in know about your planned set list. Even when deliberately including some famous or familiar repertoire you want your audience to know and love, remember the focus is on making this your song and your performance for your purposes. Don’t just cover a song for yourself and your audience – re-discover it.
Kim Edwards - Dr. Kim Edwards holds a PhD in literature, and when not teaching English, drama, cabaret or writing, she is a freelance writer, scholar, ...
Join the Conversation