Particularly in today’s society, theatre audience etiquette is a learned ability. With home theatres, kids’ movies, festival and school events, childen are used to public entertainment environments where they can make noise, move about, and play as they like. Preparing beforehand and then helping your children understand what is expected of them in a live performance theatre audience, and appreciate what is happening in front of and round them, will keep them interested and engaged throughout the show.
Booking Theatre Tickets
Avoid booking aisle seats unless you really think it likely you will need to leave early: for kids, the sense of sitting in among grown-ups as opposed to the temptation of an open aisle to run out into will promote more appropriate theatre audience behavior. Ask about view and position when booking tickets to make sure your child will be able to see well: some theatres can provide booster seats for children, or you may want to bring along a small thick cushion.
Consider matinees rather than night shows: daytime audiences are more likely to have other families attending and display more understanding when it comes to children learning how to behave for the first time in the theatre.
Arrive Early at the Theatre
Get to the venue early, so your child can get used to the space and the crowds in the foyer, see the promotional posters, feel anticipation and excitement about the show – and definitely go to the bathroom! Talk to your child about what he thinks the performance will be like, and what she knows about the show already.
Buying a Program
Consider investing in a program: letting your child buy it herself will help make it even more special, and it will be a great souvenir to take home afterwards. Read it together, and talk about the number of people that are needed to create live theatre, and the amount of work and types of jobs that have gone into the show your child is about to see.
Entering the Theatre
Go in early and encourage your child to hold onto and present the tickets, and appreciate his own particular seat and view. When you sit down, talk about what you can see and hear before the show, and look around at the audience and how they’re behaving. Emphasis the privilege of attending a more grown-up event, and talk about what is expected: staying in your own special seat, sitting still, being quiet.
Explain the mechanics of a theatre performance: reassure him that the stage will be bright but the audience sit in the dark so they can see well, let your child know when there will be an interval, and warn her the audience clap at the end of an act.
Help your child understand why these things are important also: that you don’t want to distract the actors on stage or annoy the people around who want to enjoy the show, and you do want to show your appreciation and respect for what you are seeing.
Explaining the Show
While some parents worry about spoiling the magic by explaining the illusion, children understand very well about the joy of pretending. Dressing up and play-acting is a familiar activity for kids, and understanding what they’re seeing is its own kind of reality can be both reassuring and exciting.
Younger children will be relieved to be reminded that scary characters or effects are just pretend or that anyone "dying" will reappear for the bows, while older children will be fascinated to think about behind-the-scenes activity: how lighting and staging effects are achieved, how props and sets are moved about, how costume changes take, and how the actors prepare for roles.
The actual enchantment of seeing the show will not be damaged by being exposed to how theatre works, and the discovery of adults playing make-believe will fuel and validate your child’s own creative and imaginative play afterwards.
At Interval
Leave quickly at interval to miss bathroom queues. Take some special snacks for in the foyer or stretch your legs outside, and ask what your child thinks of the show so far. What did she like? What does he think will happen next? Was there anything she didn’t expect? Praise your child for all appropriate behavior shown so far, and let him know a second act is usually shorter.
Now the novelty has worn off, ask what the hardest thing to do as an audience member has been, and make some plans to help in the second half. Allowing your child to sit on your lap by the very end, lean on your shoulder, or whisper an occasional comment in your ear having already proven she understands how to behave in an audience will make the end of a long show easier for the child to cope with.
After the Show
If you get a chance to go and look down into the orchestra pit, meet an actor at the stage door or in the foyer afterwards, or stop and chat with another family with children about the experience, grab it! Again, this helps children gain some context to appreciate what they’ve seen, and realize how live theatre as a real event contrasts with movies or television.
Spend some time after the big day talking about what the whole experience was like. What was the most fun thing about going to see a live performance? What was the most surprising thing? What would your child know to do next time? What did he discover about going to see a show? Be sure to praise her appropriate behavior, and reward her by planning another theatre outing where your child can help in the show selection.
Seeing live performance exposes children to art, culture, theatre, music and all kinds of new ways of perceiving and thinking about things. It encourages and validates their own imaginative play and creativity, promotes focus and concentration, and develops their ability to deal appropriately with adult social situations. Plus, going to the theatre is a wonderfully fun and special experience to share with your child that he or she is never going to forget.
Kim Edwards - Dr. Kim Edwards holds a PhD in literature, and when not teaching English, drama, cabaret or writing, she is a freelance writer, scholar, ...
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